Weeble ([info]clockworksaint) wrote,
@ 2009-05-12 23:26:00
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Apologies in advance. My laptop imploded and it has been very stressful.

Star Trek, in brief



EVERYONE: Oh noes! Teh supernova's gonna kill us all!
ROMULANS: Srsly! Iz rite next 2 us. Sum1 do sumthin.
SPOCK: I promiz I wil not let ur planet asplode.
ROMULANS: Our planet asplode!
SPOCK: ...
NERO: Oh hai Spock. Say, u seen our planet? Thot we left it round here.
SPOCK: Get out of the way there is a black hole are you stupid
---
ROBAU: Space litening. That is liek so cool.
NERO: WTF Where is Spock?
ROBAU: Who?
NERO: nm Hey what time is it?
ROBAU: Uhh...
NERO: DINNERTIEM!
---
NERO: Okay guys, new plan: wait here forever and mebbe Spock will come back and we can get our revenges.
ROMULANS: That is lamest plan ever since leaving it to Spock save our planet. Okay.

25 years later

NERO: See?!? I told u guys! I'm genius!
SPOCK: Godammit.
NERO: All ur red matters r belong 2 us.
SPOCK: This is bullshit. You r just a bunch of freaking miners. When you became experts in time-travel???
NERO: We watched Back to the Future on VHS. Shut up. Tiem to asplode us some planets.
---
KIRK: Guys! Srsly! This is just liek when my father died!
EVERYONE: ffs you always say that. It's nothing like it.
KIRK: See?!? I told u guys! I'm genius!
NEW SPOCK: I hate you. Go die on a rock.
---
KIRK: wtf unnecessary ice monsters??
SPOCK: Oh hai, have some tasty plot. Now get back to work.
SCOTTY: wtf unnecessary Charlie and the Chocolate Factory??
NEW SPOCK: This is too silly I need to go lie down.
KIRK: Okay guys, new plan: We follow Nero. Then kill him.
EVERYONE: That is lamest plan ever since sending entire fleet to Vulcan with no recon. Okay.
---
NERO: wtf Transporters r so cheap.
NEW SPOCK: All ur red matterz r belong 2 me.
NERO: Argh! Give it back.
NEW SPOCK: Okay.
NERO: Argh! Do not want! wtf your not even dead??? Transporters r so cheap!!!
---
SPOCK: No srsly, don't worry. I will take on burden of repopulating Vulcan race. Go have fun in space.
NEW SPOCK: ...

These are the voyages...


(7 comments) - (Post a new comment)


[info]ms_medea
2009-05-13 08:46 am UTC (link)
You left out the really uncomfortable part where Uhura and Spock make out.

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[info]purple_witch
2009-05-13 10:55 am UTC (link)
*teehee* I rather liked it! But then I'm not a Trekkie Fan at all....

(Reply to this)


[info]amont
2009-05-13 03:51 pm UTC (link)
Nice one.
Must remember not to read this stuff at work. Getting funny looks from people now.

(Reply to this)


[info]captain_caveman
2009-05-14 10:36 pm UTC (link)
That's the most brilliant recap I ever did read. :D

(Reply to this)


[info]lordofthemoon
2009-05-18 11:13 am UTC (link)
And yet, despite it all, I still enjoyed the film :).

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]clockworksaint
2009-05-18 12:41 pm UTC (link)
Sorry, I probably should have made that clear: I loved the film. It was amazing. The casting was perfect, it was great fun and I enjoyed every minute of it. I just found that afterwards, upon reflection, it didn't make as much sense as I'd thought it had. Still a great film.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]lordofthemoon
2009-05-19 12:29 pm UTC (link)
Yeah, same here. I started thinking about it afterwards, realised where I was going and just stopped :). As you say, the cast were excellent and it was, indeed, great fun.

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(7 comments) - (Post a new comment)

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